Bitter sweet pilgrimage – a refugee returns

“When I heard the occupation regime would allow Greek Cypriots to cross the ‘green line’ I thought that I should not go back as a visitor to my own land. But I realised that people’s ‘visit’ to their homes was not merely a visit but a pilgrimage and for days I could not sleep or eat.

Crossing the occupation line was unsettling – we had mixed feelings and this was proving to be a bitter-sweet experience.

Entering Morphou, my home town, after decades was like living a dream. I felt so overwhelmed as we walked the streets of Morphou in dismay. It has deteriorated so much. The old cemetery has been turned into a car park, the new cemetery desecrated… all the crosses were broken. I cried for a mother, I know personally, who longs to come back and search for the unmarked grave of her son, killed by Turkish soldiers in 1974… With strange contradiction I felt so happy to be back and so sad and angry to see the destruction and the imposed changes. We visited our family property, the orange groves, the factory, the land and finally we went to our two houses. Going back to our neighbourhood and knocking on the door of the family home to be let in, was so strange. We went in… it was in bad condition… so many happy childhood memories.

We picked oranges and flowers from our land… we collected soil from the beloved land to bring back to London, and more importantly, to take to the graves of our family members who worked hard on this land and are now buried away from home. As our tears fell to the ground we promised we will return.

My second visit to the occupied areas was with my relatives to Lapithos, where my family originally comes from. I felt equally upset to see the destruction and the desecrated graves. We searched for the graves of our loved ones. At the first cemetery of Ayios Mamas all that was left from our uncle was a broken cross, thrown with others inside the ruined small church. There was no grave to go to and lay some flowers. Sadly all we could do was light a candle on the broken cross. Half of the cemetery was desecrated and the other half taken over by luxury villas. We were determined to find the graves of our family members. The second cemetery of Archangelos is high on the hills. We found the family grave of our great-grandmother and great-grandfather.

We cleaned the stone, laid some flowers and lit a candle… we were so sorry it has taken so long… Going around Lapithos I personally felt overwhelmed by the beauty of the place that I forgot everything else. How could we have left behind such a beautiful land? Once again we lovingly collected soil from the beloved land, making the same promise. We will return.